WELCOME TO THE JAMIE SHOW!

So yea, i just got back from the bar, seen some very good looking men, got my ass felt by a rather attractive black man, who if he had danced with me wouldn;'t have been so bad except he grabbed my ass. I am down though soooooo down, some of my friends can't understand that........ they expect me to be "ON" all the time, sometimes i just need to be me and i can't always smile and pretend i amm sorry but sometimes i just need to be alone and deal with life........ i qam not as put together as i like to let everyone to believe, though i can pretend quite well. I even let a few people see some cracks in the glass every once in a while and i really shouldn't post this.... but i will to let you all kinda know (unknowingly) that sometimes i really do just want to scream at the top of my lungs, and crawl under my desk and cry........ sometimes i can't laugh at the dumb jokes, and listen to everyone else's probs without it really affecting me, i worry about you guys each and every one of you, i have a lot of love and compassion for all of you......... I want you to all be happy and as crazy as it sounds it makes me happy to know that you are all okay........ i need to bring people fudgsicles when they are sick, or hug them when they cry, or yell at the dumb boy who doesn't realuze how special they are. I feel guilty when my baby brother is in the hospital and i am dancing at the dome ( that's right babe i went without you). I worry when you pass out while getting your tat, or when you have an episode and try and hide it from me....... i worry when you lie and say you are over soemone and are ready to move on and really you still have jealousy......... i even worry about peopel who have hurt me and are in over their heads in stupid things.......... i don't know where i was going with this or what i was trying to ecxpress and i am going to post this shit anyway please do not try and make sense of it allllllllllllllll cause i am retardded and better left alone!