Monday, July 28, 2003
Terror
So I just read someone's blog for the day, this person is very close to me..................I almost vomited, do you know what happens when you read something, and it scares the SHIT out of you...........you don't think it's serious but for the period of time that you think it might be:
You are TERRIFIED!
You keep wondering about things that were said and things that weren't said and what you should have said.................
this is that piece of "writing":
***************************************************************************************
this is my suicide note
to whom it may concern
consider this my end, my goodbye, my going out with a bang. this world is to much for a young ,confused lady like I I know nothing about living. this air is tainted and I cannot take another breath. this world is cruel and I cannot take another put down. we are cruel people you know. it makes me sad to know just how cruel we are to each other. we are ignorant people you know. we let younge children and new born babies starve to death in other countries because we are to damn 2 faced to give up a few dollars a day to help out someone other than ourselves. put down the coffee and donuts and think about someone other than yourself!
to the people who think material things are important. get a life
to the people who are so concerned about looks. your lame
to everyone else fuck you
to the kids who made fun of me in school: whos laughing now
to my mom and dad i wish we were closer
to my brother i love you
to me sad it had to be this way
this is not your fault
i love you
***************************************************************************************
Now I WIGGED OUT, I almost vomited, I ran to the washroom on personal and tried to call them............it was busy...............GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
I then got stuck on another super long call.......... and I have never been so troubled in my whole life.
I did get in contact with this persona and they did right me and Apology and I will also include the email I sent them and their reply, mind you it is a little censored to keep the identity private!
#########################################################################################
I am HYPER-PISSED AT YOU RIGHT NOW
>
>THEY ARE NOT EVEN WORDS TO DESCRIBE THE ANGER AND PAIN I FEEL RIGHT
>NOW
>
>
>I DON'T KNOW WHERE IN THE FUCK YOU ARE
>AT......................BUT IF I DO NOT SPEAK TO YOU IN
>PERSON...........................
>
>
>I JUST READ YOUR DREADFUL BLOG ENTRY AND ALMOST VOMITED AT WORK, I
>WENT TO THE BATHROOM AND CALLED MY MOM
>CRYING...............................
>
>IF THAT WAS SOME SORT OF FUCKING SICK JOKE I WILL BE COMING TO NEW
>BRUNSWICK NEXT WEEK TO BEAT YOUR HEAD IN! I AM SO TWISTED MAD
>RIGHT NOW IT IS NOT EVEN FUNNY
>
>
>I WILL BE CALLING YOU TONIGHT AND I DON'T FUCKING CARE
>ANYMORE...........................
>
>
>FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK
>
>
>JAMIE
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
RESPONSE:
dude im sooo sorry. i swear on my life nothing was meant by that post. i was watching this movie 'pump up the radio' and not to go into any great detail about the movie but this radio dj takes about his friends death blah blah blah and i dont understand suicide and i dont want to cause its not a good thing but for some reason i wrote that. i didnt think it would be taken serioulsy but obvisouly i never thought that threw to well. it was a joke,a very bad joke and im sorry i made you worry so much. i feel like shit now. thanks for ragging me out though, made me realize how dumb i am. so sorry jamie. i deleted the post. im a fucked up kid who has to much time on my hands and decided it would be funny to write fucked up shit in my journal.again im sorry.
___________________________________________________________________________________________
anyway I am posting this stuff.................. I need to go home and deal with another friends crap with her boyfriend and I need to cry! Not even totally sure what I even wrote in this...............................
You are TERRIFIED!
You keep wondering about things that were said and things that weren't said and what you should have said.................
this is that piece of "writing":
***************************************************************************************
this is my suicide note
to whom it may concern
consider this my end, my goodbye, my going out with a bang. this world is to much for a young ,confused lady like I I know nothing about living. this air is tainted and I cannot take another breath. this world is cruel and I cannot take another put down. we are cruel people you know. it makes me sad to know just how cruel we are to each other. we are ignorant people you know. we let younge children and new born babies starve to death in other countries because we are to damn 2 faced to give up a few dollars a day to help out someone other than ourselves. put down the coffee and donuts and think about someone other than yourself!
to the people who think material things are important. get a life
to the people who are so concerned about looks. your lame
to everyone else fuck you
to the kids who made fun of me in school: whos laughing now
to my mom and dad i wish we were closer
to my brother i love you
to me sad it had to be this way
this is not your fault
i love you
***************************************************************************************
Now I WIGGED OUT, I almost vomited, I ran to the washroom on personal and tried to call them............it was busy...............GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
I then got stuck on another super long call.......... and I have never been so troubled in my whole life.
I did get in contact with this persona and they did right me and Apology and I will also include the email I sent them and their reply, mind you it is a little censored to keep the identity private!
#########################################################################################
I am HYPER-PISSED AT YOU RIGHT NOW
>
>THEY ARE NOT EVEN WORDS TO DESCRIBE THE ANGER AND PAIN I FEEL RIGHT
>NOW
>
>
>I DON'T KNOW WHERE IN THE FUCK YOU ARE
>AT......................BUT IF I DO NOT SPEAK TO YOU IN
>PERSON...........................
>
>
>I JUST READ YOUR DREADFUL BLOG ENTRY AND ALMOST VOMITED AT WORK, I
>WENT TO THE BATHROOM AND CALLED MY MOM
>CRYING...............................
>
>IF THAT WAS SOME SORT OF FUCKING SICK JOKE I WILL BE COMING TO NEW
>BRUNSWICK NEXT WEEK TO BEAT YOUR HEAD IN! I AM SO TWISTED MAD
>RIGHT NOW IT IS NOT EVEN FUNNY
>
>
>I WILL BE CALLING YOU TONIGHT AND I DON'T FUCKING CARE
>ANYMORE...........................
>
>
>FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK
>
>
>JAMIE
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
RESPONSE:
dude im sooo sorry. i swear on my life nothing was meant by that post. i was watching this movie 'pump up the radio' and not to go into any great detail about the movie but this radio dj takes about his friends death blah blah blah and i dont understand suicide and i dont want to cause its not a good thing but for some reason i wrote that. i didnt think it would be taken serioulsy but obvisouly i never thought that threw to well. it was a joke,a very bad joke and im sorry i made you worry so much. i feel like shit now. thanks for ragging me out though, made me realize how dumb i am. so sorry jamie. i deleted the post. im a fucked up kid who has to much time on my hands and decided it would be funny to write fucked up shit in my journal.again im sorry.
___________________________________________________________________________________________
anyway I am posting this stuff.................. I need to go home and deal with another friends crap with her boyfriend and I need to cry! Not even totally sure what I even wrote in this...............................
